Understanding Religious Trauma: How Faith Can Harm and How to Heal

Mar 21

What is Religious Trauma?

Religious trauma is an emotional and psychological reaction to abusive religious experiences, typically from controlling, fear-based, or extremely dogmatic belief systems and communities. It can result when individuals feel extreme guilt, shame, fear, or emotional abuse in the name of religion. Although religion can be a source of comfort and guidance for many, it can also be used as a tool for manipulation, control, and even psychological damage.

Signs and Symptoms of Religious Trauma

Religious trauma presents differently for each person, but some typical symptoms are:

Anxiety and Fear: Ongoing fear of punishment, spending eternity in hell (often described as a lake of perpetual fire), or divine wrath.
Guilt and Shame: Profound feelings of worthlessness or sinfulness, usually associated with strict moral doctrines around being inherently evil. (This can be increased for women due to teachings around Eve.)
Depression and Hopelessness: Loss of identity, purpose, or meaning following departure from a high-control religious group.
PTSD-like Symptoms: Flashbacks, nightmares, or panic attacks in response to religious symbols, words, places, or experiences.
Difficulty Setting Boundaries: Sense of duty to abide by religious expectations even when they are negative. Not being taught it is ok to trust your intuition and say no.
Loss of Community: Alienation, rejection, or being disowned once one departs from a religious setting, particularly if family and friends are also heavily invested.
Sexual Guilt and Dysfunction: Trauma due to purity culture, sexual repression teachings, or shame of normal human desires. Teachings associating pleasure with negativity vs. health and positivity.

Factors that often lead to Religious Trauma

Religious trauma will usually stem from exposure to environments that reinforce obedience, shame, and fear over personal well-being and autonomy. It is also more likely to occur when someone was required by their parents to be exposed to the beliefs since childhood and not allowed to choose their beliefs or consent to attending the services and listening to the teachings. Some of the factors that lead to religious trauma include:

High-Control Religious Groups: Such as cults or fundamentalist sects discouraging critical inquiry and imposing stern compliance with teachings. Questioning or challenging the group’s teachings may be considered “blashphemy” or “arrogant.” In some groups, questions are claimed to be welcome, but in reality not agreeing with the majority means that you are not accepted.
Fear-Based Teachings: Messages of constant damnation, divine wrath, or spiritual battle can create pervasive anxiety. These messages may also include training young children as “soldiers for Christ” and preparing them to evangelize others due to fear that one’s friends or others in the world who haven’t heard the gospel will burn in hell for eternity. Other examples include sermons with claims that the religious group is persecuted by the outside world, creating a false sense of insecurity and fear of others outside of the religious group. Being fed detailed images of a “Lake of Burning Fire” or other hell-related images and detailed descriptions can lead to not only fear, but anxiety, panic attacks, and even OCD symptoms. This fear-based messaging is especially harmful to young children due to their early stages of brain development.
Religious Homophobia and Transphobia: Sermons and teachings against LGBTQ+ identities create profound psychological turmoil and self-abhorrence and suicidal ideation or attempts. Some churches have also historically been involved in conversion therapy, which involved severe physical, emotional, mental, and at times sexual abuse. This practice has been denounced by the American Psychological Association.
Purity Culture and Sexual Shame: Strict teachings about modesty, abstinence, and sexual morality tend to lead to body shame, fear of intimacy, and unhealthy relationships.
Religious Gaslighting: Manipulation by religious leaders who minimize personal experiences, doubts, or concerns as evidence of weak faith can lead to individuals not seeking out mental or medical care when needed. It can also lead to severe issues with self-trust and autonomy.
Religious-Based Abuse: Physical, emotional, or sexual abuse can be concealed or rationalized by religious institutions, leading to victims receiving little to no support or professional services to heal.

The Impact of Religious Trauma

Religious trauma also has long-term consequences on mental, emotional, and even physical well-being. Survivors can also face issues of trust, problems in building healthy relationships, and difficulty in creating a new world view or belief system. They might also develop religious OCD (scrupulosity), experience existential crises, or have long-term stress-related illnesses due to the autoimmune effects of living in constant fear throughout their years in religion.

How to Heal from Religious Trauma

Healing from religious trauma is a very personal process, but there are some steps that can assist in the healing process:

1. Acknowledge and Validate Your Experience

One of the most crucial steps in healing is to acknowledge that your experiences are real. If you were hurt by religious teachings or practices, your pain is real and needs to be acknowledged.

2. Seek Professional Support

Therapists who specialize in religious trauma, childhood trauma, or deconstruction can provide guidance in unpacking religious conditioning and its impact on your mental health. Therapy modalities such as acceptance and commitment therapy (ACT), eye movement desensitization and reprocessing (EMDR), and Internal Family Systems (IFS)/inner child work can be especially helpful.

3. Deconstruct Your Beliefs at Your Own Pace

Deconstruction is the act of exploring and reassessing religious beliefs. It is acceptable to question, modify, or abandon beliefs that are no longer working for you. This can be done through:

Reading various points of view about faith, spirituality, and philosophy.
Having open discussions with encouraging people.
Learning about other spiritual or secular belief systems.
Check internally after each new exposure and notice how your body responds or resonates with the belief/thought. Document what resonates most with you.

4. Set Healthy Boundaries

If you're from a religious background that's still pressuring or shaming you, it's important to establish boundaries. This could be limiting contact with some family members, staying away from religious events that cause distress, or establishing new social groups that honor your autonomy. Remember that boundaries can change at any time, and that many boundaries may only be temporary and shift with your growth and healing.

5. Reclaim Your Identity and Autonomy

Religious trauma usually takes away one's identity. Re-establishing your sense of self beyond a religious context requires discovering personal values, interests, and passions. Try journaling, art, or an activity that makes you happy and content. Consider therapy with a psychotherapist trained in Acceptance and Commitment therapy where the focus is on discovering your personal values or Internal Family Systems where the focus is on getting to know each of the unique parts of yourself that you may have buried in your religious upbringing and welcoming them back into your life.

6. Have a Supportive Community

Exiting a religious group can be lonely, so it is important to find a new support network. Seek out secular or interfaith groups, online support forums, or trauma recovery groups where you can exchange experiences and meet others on the same path. Join our Whole Health Counseling’s Facebook support group.

7. Redefine Spirituality (If Desired)

Others do find comfort in spirituality outside of religion. This may manifest in terms of embracing meditation, nature, humanism, spiritual rituals (tarot cards, crystals, journaling), or a personal connection with the universe. Others will live fully secular lives—and that's fine too.

Final Thoughts

Religious trauma is a multifaceted and deeply individualized issue, but it can be healed. By facing the pain, reaching out for support, and working toward healing, people can reclaim their lives, establish healthy relationships, and find new meaning and purpose in life. Whether you remain spiritual, investigate new beliefs, or become secular, your path is valid, and you are worthy of living without fear and shame. You have always been enough, and it takes a commendable amount of courage to walk away from what you know is no longer right for you. Congratulations on already exhibiting significant bravery.

If you or someone you know is experiencing religious trauma, remember this: You are not alone. There is hope, and you can heal. If you still feel lost, please reach out by sending me an email or booking your consultation with me.